Getting to the Bottom of Things – Erotic Spanking 101

and Gift Card Give Away

 

Thanks for dropping by. I’m Casea Major and am excited to be at BDSM Book Reviews today for a release PARTY of my first BDSM story – Night with a Dom.

In celebration, I’m giving away a $10 Gift Card to the winner’s choice of Amazon or Barnes and Noble. Leave a comment with your email for your chance to win.

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What is it about an erotic spanking that is so appealing?

There are as many different answers to that question as there are people.  For some it’s the exchange of power, for others the role-play, still for others it could be the actual sensation.

If you are interested in adding spanking to you sexual foreplay, consider what it is about the element of spanking that arouses you and what it is that may turn you off. Do research and talk to your partner. Ask lots of questions before you act. Make sure both Spanker and Spankee are on the same page. This is no time to be coy. Speak your mind. The more specific you are the better for you and your partner.

Some items to discuss:

Positioning – what is comfortable, what is not

Strength of spanks – pain tolerance 1-10 scale

Safe word – A predetermined word that serves to terminate the activity

Implements – Hand, belt/strap, paddle, cane, etc.

Role Play – setting the scene

After limits are negotiated there are several key elements to a good spanking that will enhance the experience.

The Spanker should

Set the stage – prepare the setting, implements and have a basic plan of action

Relax –a tense arm will tire more quickly and a rigid hand may end up more hurt than the behind it’s popping.

Start slow and light — try a few light test spanks, gradually increasing intensity

Always Pay Attention — to the signals of your partner.

 

The Spankee should

Allow the Spanker to take control.

Relax – a tense body is more likely to get hurt

Always communicate – communicate what is working and what isn’t and never be afraid to use your safe word

The basic components of a good spanking scene

Anticipation – Tell the spankee they are to receive punishment then make them wait for punishment they know is coming

Preparation/Presentation – Order the spankee to present him/herself in a particular way whether it is to put on or remove clothing, or to gather the implements, go to a particular location/room

Ritual – This is when the spanker can communicate how the spanking will take place and/or require the spankee to perform some ritual like kneeling or taking up their position

Punishment – After the spankee has taken their position, the punishment begins at the discretion of the Spanker

Aftercare – Can be anything from cuddling to sex but should be something that brings the couple closer together in a bonding experience.

More information about erotic spankings can be found at:

http://www.yourtango.com/20086453/spanking-for-beginners

http://sexsecretsblog.com/the-basics-of-erotic-spanking/

http://www.goodvibes.com/content.jhtml?id=how-to-spank

Night with a Dom  is available now at all major retailers and the Decadent website.

Melody Manning’s workaholic ambition, coupled with a slave-driving former boss, has made her the youngest market analyst in her firm. It’s also killed her personal life, including losing her fiancé. When she receives a message from him on New Year’s Eve announcing his engagement to another woman, Mel loses it. Her new, more compassionate boss has the perfect solution for her—get laid. Good and laid.

At his suggestion, she signs up with the 1Night Stand service, listing her deepest sexual desires on the application.  A speedy response from Madame Eve has Melody on her way to Sonoma Valley wine country and a one-night stand with a mysterious Dom.

The sexy, masked Master promises to get to the bottom of her guilt and provide ultimate satisfaction under the safety of his stern hand. After an emotional night of submission and uninhibited passion, will her lover’s unmasking lead to the end of their encounter or give Mel another chance at love?

Major Love ~~~ Major Romance

Prior to becoming a writer of romantic fiction, Casea Major worked in the legal field for a non-profit dispute resolution company for ten years.  She is now a full-time mom to three preschool children with whom she and her husband live happily…most of the time.  When she isn’t chained to her laptop, she enjoys Cary Grant movies and crocheting.

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